i dont like the me that i am in right now.
i tried so hard to change things.
i tried so hard to make things better.
i tried so hard to change my mindset.
i tried so hard to smile.
i tried so hard to be true.
i tried so hard to deceive myself.
i tried so hard to have fun.
i tried so hard,
to do so many things. that i do not like.
to do so many things that i feel sick of.
to do so many things that is just so not me.
i dont understand.
why is this so hard?
when all and all fails,
i think im gonna fall too.
quietly,
silenty.
the me right now,
im feeling so ugly,
inside out.
totally.
maybe,
when this feeling overwhelmes me,
maybe,
i wouldnt be here.
maybe,
i look fine to you.
maybe,
im just mad inside.
maybe,
or i am just feeling emo.
i dont know.
damn.
RAH~
________
but nvm,
on a happier note,
huang yi da's album is out!
i really like him alot.
cause i find his songs really meaningful.
not because of the looks.
even though he is kinda cute~
yadayada.
random.
and here are some provocative questions that qian and steph and me discussed during the 4 days, 48 hours of our work,
counting taxis together.
and i think they are really quite provocative.
so here it goes,
and i shall start with probably in my opinion,
the most provocative of all,
IF YOU ARE BEING RAPED BY A MAN,
AND UNFORTUNATELY,
YOU GOT PREGNANT WITH HIS CHILD,
WOULD YOU CHOOSE TO ABORT IT OR GIVE BIRTH TO IT?
i chose to give birth to it,
after all,
its a life im talking about.
but qian and steph both beg to differ.
:S
WOULD YOU RATHER CHOOSE SOMEONE WHO IS POOR, BUT LOVES YOU,
OR SOMEONE WHO IS RICH,
BUT DO NOT LOVE YOU?
WOULD YOU RATHER BE RICH BUT UNHAPPY,
OR POOR BUT HAPPY?
yadayada.
still got lots more.
but i cant seem to rmb all of them at this point of time.
zz
but anyways,
chatting online with the peeps like qian mich xian and mol made me less emozxz.
rah.
hahaha.
whats the connection between rambutans and bananas and icecream and uncles?
uncles who sell bananas and rambutans flavoured ice cream.
ding dong ding dong~
its too funny to tell you.
i bet you cant figure out.
*winks to mol*
RAH.
power of friends.
zz
and sometimes,
i wonder why do stupid guys exist in this world?
why issit so that this guy can break up with lky for 4 years and still ask her back 4years later?
what the hell.
cannot be.
must be she is still in her own lala land.
she got excessive imagination power.
i mean,
who in the right mind,
would like a bad tempered yadayada girl back?
CANNOT BE.
even as her used to be friends in sec 2,
we also cant stand her,
who can stand her?
who knows,
im not trying to be mean,
maybe she pays her so called boyfriend one million bucks a day to be her bf.
zzz/
who know,
maybe gilbert will ask me back.
since come to think of it,
we've broken up for so long alrdy.
AHHAHHA.
NOT FUNNY.
im not harbouring that kind of thoughts anymore.
zz.
and even if he ask me back,
whahahaha.
then i will be damn happy.
cause i can turn him down flatly.
WHAHA.
who asked him to make me suffer last time?
=x
okay maybe i take joy in torturing people,
particularly him.
i mean,
another other normal girl who broke up with her bf sometimes would imagine her boyfriend asking her back again,
and then she will turn the offer down,
flatly,
sharply,
coooly,
as if she dont need him in her life forever.
WHAHAHh.
okay whatever.
and i was reading chord's blog just now,
he's better known as dashu in huayang,
and he wrote this very nice and touching song for his grandma.
awww.
reminds me of my grandma.
lurbes.
dont wanna elaborate.
show u guys the song and lyrics nxt time.
and im listening to huang yida's song now
very nice! :)
okay,
this entry is getting way too long.
oppps.
but im definitely feeling better now~
yays.
and i cant wait to wake up to a more beautiful day tml.
cause theres no school tml.
cause i can sleep til as late as i want tml,
without worrying that theres school tml,
without worrying that ive got exams/tests tml,
without worrying what clothes i need to wear tml,
without worrying whether am i repeating my clothes tml,
whoooo.
thats post-poly-current-holidaying life.
i like to be in my ultra comfy home clothes.
high.
OKAY BYE.
LURBES
:)
i tried so hard to change things.
i tried so hard to make things better.
i tried so hard to change my mindset.
i tried so hard to smile.
i tried so hard to be true.
i tried so hard to deceive myself.
i tried so hard to have fun.
i tried so hard,
to do so many things. that i do not like.
to do so many things that i feel sick of.
to do so many things that is just so not me.
i dont understand.
why is this so hard?
when all and all fails,
i think im gonna fall too.
quietly,
silenty.
the me right now,
im feeling so ugly,
inside out.
totally.
maybe,
when this feeling overwhelmes me,
maybe,
i wouldnt be here.
maybe,
i look fine to you.
maybe,
im just mad inside.
maybe,
or i am just feeling emo.
i dont know.
damn.
RAH~
________
but nvm,
on a happier note,
huang yi da's album is out!
i really like him alot.
cause i find his songs really meaningful.
not because of the looks.
even though he is kinda cute~
yadayada.
random.
and here are some provocative questions that qian and steph and me discussed during the 4 days, 48 hours of our work,
counting taxis together.
and i think they are really quite provocative.
so here it goes,
and i shall start with probably in my opinion,
the most provocative of all,
IF YOU ARE BEING RAPED BY A MAN,
AND UNFORTUNATELY,
YOU GOT PREGNANT WITH HIS CHILD,
WOULD YOU CHOOSE TO ABORT IT OR GIVE BIRTH TO IT?
i chose to give birth to it,
after all,
its a life im talking about.
but qian and steph both beg to differ.
:S
WOULD YOU RATHER CHOOSE SOMEONE WHO IS POOR, BUT LOVES YOU,
OR SOMEONE WHO IS RICH,
BUT DO NOT LOVE YOU?
WOULD YOU RATHER BE RICH BUT UNHAPPY,
OR POOR BUT HAPPY?
yadayada.
still got lots more.
but i cant seem to rmb all of them at this point of time.
zz
but anyways,
chatting online with the peeps like qian mich xian and mol made me less emozxz.
rah.
hahaha.
whats the connection between rambutans and bananas and icecream and uncles?
uncles who sell bananas and rambutans flavoured ice cream.
ding dong ding dong~
its too funny to tell you.
i bet you cant figure out.
*winks to mol*
RAH.
power of friends.
zz
and sometimes,
i wonder why do stupid guys exist in this world?
why issit so that this guy can break up with lky for 4 years and still ask her back 4years later?
what the hell.
cannot be.
must be she is still in her own lala land.
she got excessive imagination power.
i mean,
who in the right mind,
would like a bad tempered yadayada girl back?
CANNOT BE.
even as her used to be friends in sec 2,
we also cant stand her,
who can stand her?
who knows,
im not trying to be mean,
maybe she pays her so called boyfriend one million bucks a day to be her bf.
zzz/
who know,
maybe gilbert will ask me back.
since come to think of it,
we've broken up for so long alrdy.
AHHAHHA.
NOT FUNNY.
im not harbouring that kind of thoughts anymore.
zz.
and even if he ask me back,
whahahaha.
then i will be damn happy.
cause i can turn him down flatly.
WHAHA.
who asked him to make me suffer last time?
=x
okay maybe i take joy in torturing people,
particularly him.
i mean,
another other normal girl who broke up with her bf sometimes would imagine her boyfriend asking her back again,
and then she will turn the offer down,
flatly,
sharply,
coooly,
as if she dont need him in her life forever.
WHAHAHh.
okay whatever.
and i was reading chord's blog just now,
he's better known as dashu in huayang,
and he wrote this very nice and touching song for his grandma.
awww.
reminds me of my grandma.
lurbes.
dont wanna elaborate.
show u guys the song and lyrics nxt time.
and im listening to huang yida's song now
very nice! :)
okay,
this entry is getting way too long.
oppps.
but im definitely feeling better now~
yays.
and i cant wait to wake up to a more beautiful day tml.
cause theres no school tml.
cause i can sleep til as late as i want tml,
without worrying that theres school tml,
without worrying that ive got exams/tests tml,
without worrying what clothes i need to wear tml,
without worrying whether am i repeating my clothes tml,
whoooo.
thats post-poly-current-holidaying life.
i like to be in my ultra comfy home clothes.
high.
OKAY BYE.
LURBES
:)